Kate and Katie talk about the language that they struggle with as carers, and the impact that it has on them, their families and the loved ones they care for. This was played as part of an Over A Brew session for Warwickshire County Council on the 18th Sept 2024
We took this extract from a longer video that was made for the ADASS East of England Region, by Vicky Sargent, Director CLGdotTV. https://clgdottv.com/
Thank you Vicky.
Transcript
I think it would be really helpful if local authorities just thought about using normal, everyday language that everybody else uses. So, you know, would you working in services like yourself be called the cared for? I doubt it very much. You know, if you're going for, uh, a cup of coffee with a friend, would you refer to it as well? I'm accessing the community today. I've got many memories of where we've interacted with professionals with services, and unfortunately, I've got memories of times where words hurt and where the language that people used actually stung and stayed with me
I. I think the words that we use in the health and care system to describe people really matter because they reveal the underlying values which the system attaches to them. And I think that's why language is continually evolving because it reflects current thinking within the system
The word carer. I feel that, uh, there's a great deal of people that don't understand what that word means and don't see themselves as a carer. And my Children, for instance, have grown up with Nadia, and they don't definitely don't see themselves as young carers and never did they're her brothers and their sisters
Words I find really annoying are, um, things like the cared for and people talking about respite, which means something difficult and unpleasant and just within the system, I think I talked about the word special. And when Maddie was growing up and it was a birthday, I would really struggle to find a birthday card that didn't have the word special in it. Because that sort of it gets attached to your child quite early on
And it's got sort of lots of negative emotions around it for me. Um, lots of people I know don't like the words service user because it implies you're using the system and taking advantage. Um, so, you know, we prefer to talk about people who access services or people who draw on services
Um, I don't like the way the system talks about beds. You know, they're always commissioning beds. Uh, when actually you're talking about you want a room, you want somewhere nice for somebody to go to have a a really good break and have a great time
It's not about getting a bed for somebody. Other words that really annoy me are are things like case studies and cases like my daughter is not another number. She's not another case
Her case is about to go to panel. And that's another word that I don't like. We don't even know who is actually at the panel
Um, other words that seem to be a bit of a bug bearer for me are labels, uh, as as unpaid carers. That's a label. And to me, labels are for jam jars, so avoiding labels, describing the person or the strengths that they bring
And the same describing carers. You know, we're not all the same each parent carer. Each carer is a unique person in their own right
You know, being called a sibling or having peers, Um uh, going to activities rather than we went to a gig on Sunday night, Um, in Manchester. Uh, and we we were on the accessible platform, which was, which was great, thanks to Tom Odell, which was amazing. That's like cats having a life
It's not an activity. It's not, um, something that it's what it's it's It's a life. It's an ordinary life
I've noticed when people are talking about services for usually older people, the language we use as a society is to talk about putting people in care homes. And I just hate that concept of putting a human being anywhere. So why don't we talk about enabling somebody to move to a different place to live or about getting a a different life or a better life, or better support for older people and and some disabled people as well? The system talks about toting and feeding and their words I hear related to people when when they're very young, so Children, you know, babies and toddlers, you might use that language
So, I I just find that all very disrespectful and also even training. You know, all the time you hear about people going on moving and handling training, people aren't objects to be moved and and handled about. You know it's about helping people to move
So what's always missing is the word people or person with the language around toting. Perhaps it's easier for professionals and commissioners to see it like that rather than the support that's needed, because if it's toile in inverted commas, it can be something that's done in 1520 minutes or is supporting somebody to go to the loo is a whole different picture. Um, it could be a conversation beforehand, and it could be given choice
And it could be actually making that experience as positive as possible when somebody actually needs somebody else to wipe their bottom. So I think for professionals, it's much easier to use this terminology because it makes their lives, especially at a time when there are so many cuts that it makes it easier to reduce services because that person only requires toting. I think that it would really help if people who work in services could recognise that some of the language they use is dehumanising and offensive
One of the key messages is to see us all as humans and to see us as people and to be kind, ask us how we are, find out a little bit about us and who we are, what we did beforehand. We've all got a history. We've all got lots to offer, and we've all got immense knowledge and our experts in what we do